This marks the eleventh year of this annual tradition, which officially makes it my longest (voluntary) commitment.  I served my country for ten years and have attended about ten years worth of post-secondary education, as well.  But eleven is new territory, and hopefully, this is one I can take all the way to the proverbial “end zone” (which turns out to be a much better pun than I intended). It is poignant to sit down once a year, every year, to take stock of the life lessons I’ve learned. But no matter how long it takes to get started, once I do, they all come flying out – and every year, I’ve had to cut to get down to the appropriate number. So, it turns out that I’ve learned how to learn (and how to write) along the way. What’s more, I’ve gotten good at it, and the things I learn get better every year.  My true hope for publishing this is that I will inspire at least one of you do undertake a similar venture, and that if you do, you’ll share it with me. Because the most important thing I’ve learned in 46 years is that if you can’t or won’t share the knowledge you’ve gained, you never really had it in the first place. 

And with that… here are the forty-six things I’ve learned this year:

1. All of it, and I mean all of it, is relationships.
2. Every generation’s “uncool” becomes their kids’ version of “cool” – which makes every generation of middle-aged parents lament about how they were “born too soon…” No, it’s called “rebellion” and teenagers will always be maddeningly good at it.
3. Even after eleven years, teenagers still aren’t funny. Yes, none of them.  No, not even a little. Some truths are indelible.
4. We are the sum of the commitments we’ve made, and our character turns out to be our willingness to make more of them. 
5. There are only two choices when it comes to finding meaning in the world around us: either none of it matters or all of it does… and nihilism is stupid.
6. You can tell an awful lot about a person by their jeans. Also, don’t be cheap with your jeans. 
7. This one took me a long time to learn but here it is: all martyrdom is stupid (and useless).
8. In business, you shouldn’t use the word “millions” if you don’t have at least “thousands” to spend.
9. When you think everyone is looking at you, no one is looking at you.
10. Everyone is serious.  Yes, everyone.  And yes, that’s both the scariest and most inspiring thing I’ve learned this year… or ever, really.
11. The only guaranteed ineffective way to get someone to calm down is to tell them to “calm down.”
12. Being cool is about being wholly committed to being yourself, whatever that is. 
13. Meditation is one of the best things you can do for your health – but you have to be ready for it. 
14. Have the damned doughnut.  No one went to their grave, wistfully thinking of all the kale they’ve eaten. 
15. Life is risk and pain, punctuated by moments of unadulterated bliss.  If you can’t handle that, book a trip to Sweden and check out, already.
16. I used to think the idea of Bill & Ted saving the world was completely ridiculous.  Now, I’m not so sure we shouldn’t just start with being excellent to each other (and partying on, dude).
17. There is love all around you.  Constantly.  It’s up to you if you accept it or not. 
18. Of all the pending future innovations, the one I’m most excited about is driverless cars – because I don’t hate anyone as much as I hate everyone while I’m driving.  Can we all agree that driving stopped being fun about 10 years ago?
19. Intellect is directly correlated to helmet usage.
20. It isn’t just OK to cry, it’s fantastic to cry. People that cry aren’t weird, people that don’t cry are weird!  Let. It. Out.  You’ll feel better. Promise.
21. There isn’t a good reason not to call an old friend.  There are lots of reasons not to call an old girlfriend/boyfriend.
22. There are two possible percentages of the world’s scientific knowledge that you can believe in and still be an ethically consistent and reasonable (i.e. real) person: 100% and 0%.  Anything in between is the height of self-indulgence.  Honestly, what qualifies you to decide how much of science to believe in?!?
23. Wear the hat.  Yeah, it’s ridiculous, but what makes it great isn’t how you put it on, but how you pull it off.   
24. You can still love the journey and want to get places.  Doing just one is really missing out.
25. I will always see the world through the lens of a John Hughes movie – and I’m completely OK with that.
26. The one thing you know to be true about someone that says they don’t need any more friends is that they absolutely need more and better friends. 
27. Never be ashamed of your vocabulary. Making people more knowledgeable so they can understand you isn’t a burden, it’s a gift.  You’re welcome – all my associates, ever.
28. You don’t Google enough things.
29. After living through five decades of music – I’m confident it will never get better than it was in the 80s. 
30. Success is loving and working with two of the best people you’ve ever known, and I am successful AF.
31. Peace is underrated and conflict is overrated.
32. Youth isn’t wasted on the young, love is.  Young people are great at being young and horrible at love.  Old folks, just the opposite.  Maybe we should disconnect love and fertility.
33. We demand way too much of people before they are 25.  Honestly, can any of us say we qualified to make the life-altering decisions we were forced to make back then?  I’m not sure I had a functioning adult brain before age 30.
34. The amount of “energy” you have is completely within your control.  My hyperactivity isn’t a disability, it’s a GD superpower.  Do you know how much I can do in a day?  I do… and it’s impressive. 
35. Learn. Every. Day.
36. You’re not allowed to “abstain” from civil rights – failing to pick a side is picking a side and yes, it’s the wrong one.
37. The hardest and most rewarding thing I’ve ever learned is how to genuinely be happy for someone else.
38. True evil never dresses the part.  To survive, it looks just like the rest of us do. 
39. Showing up isn’t 80% or 99% – it’s everything. 
40. Relax, everyone else is faking it, too.
41. I’ve truly come to appreciate almost every holiday, because celebration is always a good idea.  Except Halloween.  Fuck Halloween.
42. I like health and variety in all my meals… except breakfast – which I eat like a 1960’s plumber – pork, eggs, cheese, bread, in almost any format, always.
43. You should only see a concert again if you can get better seats – otherwise, stay home and watch it from the cameras on stage.  You’re too old for the “Upper Levels” – you know you can’t see that far.  
44. Love isn’t anything like I thought it was.  It’s so much better.
45. I seem to find everything right when I need it. 
46. I really love who I turned out to be, and I have everyone to thank for it. 

See you next June, kids.